December 2021. I cooked Christmas dinner for fifteen people while battling a blinding migraine. Nauseous, shaking, hiding in the pantry to cry — but I'd agreed months ago, and disappointing everyone felt worse than the physical pain.
That night I realised: I had no idea who I was if I wasn't helping someone.
Therapy told me "just set boundaries." Great advice — completely useless when my mind went blank in the moment. So I started writing down the exact sentences that worked. I tested them. Tweaked them. Created versions for different situations.
This is what I wish I'd had back then: the actual words to say when someone puts you on the spot.
Not theory. Not concepts.
Just proven scripts that work.